He's getting soft on me.

Uh oh.

There has been some unrest in the land of T, and not only has Hands McCoy been acting out of character, daVinci code has been hovering about my inner circle.

Hands McCoy (for more on him, see A.C.) has been wanting to hang out, and his texts are becoming less dirty and more endearing. I want to hear about you tearing my clothes off and clearing off tables, not that you want to cuddle and it'd make you happy to hang out. You're a FWB (Friend With Benefits), not PBM (Potential Boyfriend Material).

daVinci code has been doing that junior high staring thing, but he's one upped himself. He's started moving seats to be closer to wherever I'm sitting, he's having his friends talk to my friends and he's been talking to friends when I'm talking to them. STRESSFUL. If you want to talk to me, make an effort, we've been over this.

boys, can't we pull our shit together and just man up for once? I'm tired of taking the reins, and dealing with your nonsense. We're not dating so there's no incentive to even consider catering to your ego, and even if I were dating, do you think I'd date you? haha I know how useless and careless you are-- besides, you're not what I'm looking for, I'm looking for a MAN.

Long overdue.

FINALLY. Tomorrow I'm going to make up for lost time, and I cannot wait. I was chatting with Sara today about sex, and I've really and truly missed it. I'm giving up wanking for a long while because frankly I'm tired of it.

I'll update you all tomorrow (or hopefully Saturday)...

Simultaneous letting up.

Chelle and I have spent the night emailing and texting about the Nigerian and Hands McCoy. We've discovered that we are givers, who want only to be wanted without confusion. That presents a problem because we are wanting to be wooed by men who are "wooing half the free world". She deserves better than that, and I deserve it as well, but all I want is body touching, so once I get that I'm reviewing his use in my life then he might be cut.

I have a world to take over, so boys will be on the back burner once again.

He's been reassigned.

So, NYE guy has been reassigned from PBM (potential boyfriend material) to bootycall haha I'm never discouraged completely. And he's a funny charming guy, I'd like for us to be friends for sure....and if we happen to be friends who fuck, so be it! Win-win sitch in my book haha

But on another note, lately I've noticed that waaayy too many attractive, intelligent, wonderful young women are single. WHAT THE HELL GENTLEMEN?! You're fucking up and fucking sluts, get it together.

I'm not even asking you to change your Facebook status.

I was up late talking to Candice after hanging out with friends and we really talked for a long time about guys and relationshits, and we've noticed a trend. In many cases, the female is the sole pursuer and the guy is just sitting in the wings, waiting to be fetched. Dude, I don't have time for that-- I'm a busy bitch.

I don't have time for a relationshit, but I still want that companionship that comes with it you know? I'm not asking you to marry me, I certainly am not asking you to rearrange your life around me (because God knows I won't for you), and don't assume I want you to be anything you don't want to be. In all honesty if I could in a way "rent" a boyfriend that'd take the cake.

I just want a boy I can have some laughs with, have fun, seriously talk to and kiss. That's quite literally all I have time for haha time for friends, so any guy I'm with would be like a glorified friend-with-benefits. We don't have to be exclusive, nor text everyday, just as long as when we're together its just me. I am open minded to a fault, but I will not take feeling used, or cheap.

I don't want weekly dates nor do I need us to constantly be together. I'm independent and busy as hell, so if our time together could be like a mini vacation almost, that'd be excellent. Maybe when one of us has a crazy test, afterwards we could hang out and just unwind, or even study together for midterms. That'd be charming and very thoughtful. However, I'm not saying I just want to stay in, that gets tiresome. Take me out when I've been in a mood, or just surprise me.

I want to be able to talk -- like really T A L K-- to a guy, about serious and trivial things. I don't like having to make all conversation on my own, and then get a look like "what is she going on about?" If you can woo my mind, you're a shoo in. There's very little that's sexier or more intriguing than a guy who can hold his own in a debate with me or can actually teach me something I didn't know. But don't get cocky, please, arrogance is not attractive on anyone. Self-confidence and self-assurance are both very great qualities for a guy to have, but once you reach doucher levels and cross into arrogant twat, then we've got a problem.

I'm not asking for you to buy me anything, I'm not asking for us to get a dog together, I'm not even asking you to move in with me. I just want a guy to make me feel special and like a lady, I just want a guy to fit and at the same time not fit so we'll have separate lives. I don't want a boyfriend, per say, I want someone to fit my idea of a boyfriend, because frankly I don't have time for much more than that. I'd like my "boyfriend" to be busy as well, so I'm not feeling like I have to hold back and entertain you.

If you are intimidated by someone who knows what they want or how they want it, you need not even apply. I'm not even asking for submissions, just keep in mind that not all girls need constant attention, nor showers of praise; if you tried that I'd just assume you were lying half the time anyway. I just am tired of people saying that I don't know what I want or that I'm too picky-- I am what I am, take it or leave it. I'm straight forward and don't have time for bullshit, so if that makes me an undate-able bitch in your mind, then so be it-- I don't have time for boys, sissies or idiots.

I need a man to be a man. I'm tired of always having to be the guy, to be the pursuer. I want to be wooed, pursued and seduced just as much as the next girl, so stop acting like I signed up to be the boy. I'm not saying I want you to open doors or order at restaurants for me, but no means would I ever mean that, I just want a guy to step up to the plate, take the lead, the initiative.

I'm not asking for much, I'm not asking for the universe tucked into a Juicy purse, I won't even ask you to change your Facebook status, something so trivial and small, all I ask is you be a guy I can laugh with, talk to, kiss and escape reality with for a bit.

I had a hunch.

I freaking knew that the second I took the option of sex off the table that guys would come flocking up, but darn. haha but its a new year, and to bring in the new year we'll do a sexual inventory of the past year; cleansing the pallate we'll call it:

We start the year of 2008 with BS, the sex was routine, and the relationshit ran cold. I waved goodbye and never looked back.

I'm in a sexual drought until summer rolls around and Chep reappears on the scene. The chemistry was there, and our first kiss was the product of several years of repressed sexual attraction. When we had sex it was fire and ice....MMMM fantastic. But sadly we only had one passionate night, and our friendship is still on the friendly terms it always has been.

The drought continues until daVinci code and the breaking in of him. But like Chep, he's a one hit wonder, and goes down in history as the second most gorgeous penis I've ever seen. Oh what I'd have done for a round two....or twelve.

Not much sex to report in 2008, and even fewer relationshits, so we're going into 2009 ready to have fun and see what happens. Here's hoping I get my body touched more in 09 though.