the end of the road.

Well ginger broke up with me yesterday. I still feel kinda numb and I'm more disappointed he broke up with me than anything I think. That is because he broke up with me on impulse because he feels "someone could care about [me] than [he] could. He felt bad because he went an entire day without thinking about me. Big whoop, I do that too but I don't go dumping you on a whim. And the mixt signals I was getting from him-- hell the ones I've been getting since last friday-- are so baffling to me. Obviously he doesn't know where he's at, so he decides to break it off in lieu of actually talking about and owning up to his feelings-- confusion included. Very mature. Ugh. And now I've been awake since 4 am for no apparent reason, but I'm going to guess it has something to do with him. What am I saying? Of course it has something to do with him, he's the closest out of all the guys I've dated to LOML material and frankly it broke my heart a little that he was so willing to just drop me to avoid feelings or whatever his reasoning is. So he may have sabotaged our relationship and demoted it back to the ranks of relationshit, but I'll be forever grateful that he showed me the kind of relationship I deserve and was a pillar of strength in a hard time.